Originally posted February 12, 2008
In honor of that wretched stank ass holiday that is Valentine’s, I have decided to reflect on a couple of “love gone wrong” highlights of my past.
But first the disclaimer: I HATE VALENTINE’S DAY! I think it is like most other holidays – commercialized and geared to guilt men into buying flowers, candy, jewelry and other trinkets in order to increase retailers’ bottom line. Women get bent out of shape and pissed off to the highest level of Pisstivity if the man they are married to or “booed” up with fails to come through with any of the aforementioned “guilt gifts”.
Y’all have got to stop drinking the Kool-Aid!
My hatred of the holiday presents the conundrum of all conundrums because it is also my birthday. Oh, I can hear you now, “Ooooh, that’s so sweet. A Valentine’s baby“. SAVE IT! The sh*t blows worse than an Beluga whale…worse than a hooker on Stewart Avenue (the ho strip in Atlanta)…worse than Vivica Fox…worse than, ah hell, you get the point.
I was 22 yrs old, he was 23. We lived together when I first moved to Atlanta. We were immature and dysfunctional. He liked to man-handle me…never hit me with an closed fist just pushed and shoved (like that really makes a difference) when we would get into heated arguments. For a skinny dude he was strong as hell and I knew I couldn’t kick his a$$ so after one of those pushing and shoving moments, I grabbed the biggest knife in the kitchen. As I walked towards him his eyes got as big as saucers. I stomped passed him, out the front door and to his prized ’82 red Mustang GT with the dual-quad carburetor…his “baby“. Flattened all four of those high performance tires, yes I did!! Hit ‘em where it hurts was my philosophy. Turned out to be an expensive philosophy too cause I had to replace the dayum tires. Young. Stupid. In love.




