A Question of Loyalty…?


What does that mean to you? To me? How does it manifest itself in your life? In mine?

loyaltyRecently I posted an old picture of some family on Facebook. This picture brought back many warm memories but also some very painful ones. Bitter sweet and conflicted, it invokes emotions that reveal just how complicated and conflicted life can be. That picture’s image is juxtaposed against the actual reality I was experiencing at that time. Pictured are loved ones who have passed to the next realm, a few that are still with us and despite the seemingly boyish grin, a child molester.

When posting the pictured, I tagged several extended family members so they could enjoy their own trips down memory lane. Forgetting that most of those relatives are friends with “He Who Shall Not Be Named” (HWSNBN), I was taken aback and shocked he requested to tag himself in the picture – a request that I have ignored. But this brings me to the question of loyalty.

Many, if not most, family members know what happened because I told them years ago. They are all his FB friends, except for my mother. It bothers me and I wonder is it unreasonable for me to want her to NOT be connected with HWSNBN?

Even though I have forgiven, I have not forgotten nor do I allow him access to my life. Is it asking too much to want all of my immediate family to cut ties with him as well? Does loyalty to me preclude them having any contact with him?

2 thoughts on “A Question of Loyalty…?

  1. That’s a tough question sis. I’m actually taken aback that you would even post a picture of HWSNBN. And maybe in some way you doing so validates to the other family members that it’s “OK” to still have contact with him. After all, you posted a picture of him on your wall.

    Do I think you are wrong in wanting your family to shun him? No, I don’t understand how they haven’t shunned him.

    Personally, I’d take the picture down and just move on. I’d actually burn any pictures of him I have in my possession.

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